Transit Tales
Topic: Life
Honestly, traveling on the Chicago Transit Authority in the morning can be hilarious. Let's take this morning for instance.

Boarded a local #3 King Drive bus at my usual stop. It was an articulated bus, which means about 70 seats. The farebox was broken, which means free ride for everyone. Keep in mind it's raining, no one really wants to go to work and traffic is mildly affected. This has to be the slowest bus driver I have ever seen. It took 30 minutes to get from McCormick Place (2300 South) to Monroe and Michigan (100 South/100 East). Along the way the bus driver is literally ignoring the "Stop Request" signal, passing up people's bus stops. We get to 11th Street and an older lady pulls the cord. The bus driver slows down, prepares to stop, and then accelerates. The lady is pushing on the back door (which won't open) and yelling to the driver "open the door!! why won't you open the door?" The driver finally lets her off at 9th street.

While I'm on the subject of the driver, it makes no sense that this particular driver not only drove 15 miles an hour all the way downtown, but found it necessary to stop and talk to his supervisor for five minutes. In rush hour. On a major street. With angry passengers already late for work. This driver had a death wish.

Let's not forget the passengers that have no knowledge of how to deal with passengers trying to exit the bus. When you are forced to stand in the exit vestibule, and people are trying to use the exit door, common sense would dictate that the person either steps off the bus or gets out of the way. This caucasian man stood in the exit vestibule, and 7 people wanted to get off at Congress. This man DID NOT MOVE and expected everyone to GO AROUND HIM. Naturally, he got run over and literally pushed out of the way. Makes me feel as if I'm in New York.

Just think, the Chicago Trifling...oops, I mean Transit Authority is about to slash service by 30 percent and raise fares to unheard of levels.

The Two F's - Funny and Freaky
Topic: Life
I found this cool blog about CTA stories. Check it out for yourself by clicking here. It amazes me what type of stuff will happen on the city's transit system. Speaking of, the chairwoman of the Chicago Transit Authority has set up a blog answering questions about CTA, as well as the justification for preparing to raise fares and cut service (which is the same as gutting the CTA all together). You can see that blog by going to this link.

That was the funny stuff...now down to the freaky stuff.

Re'ael and I spent the past two evenings together. (No overnight visits except for the first one earlier in the week.) We've been talking, watching movies, and literally fucking like rabbits. The boy is not afraid of showing his freaky side...like today. For a big boy he can surely put his legs in some interesting positions, such as all the way up and all the way across. Talk about being flexible! He stretched his legs like that tonight while we were making out. We bumped and grinded for about a half-hour before we made me explode, and I him. Yesterday we had a repeat of last Sunday...only difference is this time we screwed for about an hour. The most romantic thing that happens when I have sex with Re'ael is that right after we climax and clean up, we fall asleep in each other's arms, and it feels so wonderful.

I haven't seen Twan since last Friday. He was supposed to come over last night but didn't because he got off work at about 1:00AM. Tonight I was hoping he'd come over but I haven't heard anything from him, save a text message he sent this afternoon in response to my inviting him over tonight. He said, quite basically, we'll c. In this race he just slid back to third.

Not sure if I talked about David. David is an attractive caucasian that hit me up on men4now, this website that I log onto for my "special moments". We met, talked, hit it off and it's apparent to me that he wants, very dearly, to be committed to someone. It can happen...only with time though. We're supposed to be hanging out on Thursday evening. Hopefully the weather will cooperate so we can truly hang out and get to know each other.

More later...

Bringing Stuff Forth - Part 2
Topic: Life
In my last entry, there was one name I neglected to put forth, Re'ale (pronounced ReAl). Re'ale is 6'4, 250 pounds and very attractive. We met off of the internet and have basically been hanging out for most of this weekend. He's 19, about to go to school and has a very wonderful heart. He's also pretty much as freaky as Twan. For instance this morning he was here (he spent the previous night with me, and it felt good, more later) and he absolutely loves to kiss. He's pretty damn good at it too, especially when he uses the tongue-ring that he's got...we pretty much explored every inch of each other's bodies, before I entered him. (If you haven't figured it out by now, I'm a versatile brotha.) Being inside him felt absolutely wonderful. We went at it for about 20 minutes before climaxing. Then we fell back asleep in each other's arms.

Moving on, I talked to Twan this evening. We haven't seen each other all weekend because he's had to work. He did tell me that he is coming over tomorrow night...and that he's staying the night with me. I'm not gonna lie, I am craving Twan, very badly. I want a repeat of what happened the last time we were together. Just thinking about him taking control and being a nigga on his business makes me feel real good inside (and makes me really hard too).

Also spoke with Vince tonight. He's got me really kinda nervous about seeing him now because tonight he confessed to taking Ectasy. Now I'm concerned because the one thing I have a zero tolerance for is drugs. Weed is aiight, but Ectasy is way on another planet somewheres. I appreciate him telling me that but it makes me real leery.

A random note totally off-topic: I upgraded my IP tracking program on my webpage and weblog so now I can zero in on anyone that reads my journal, all the way down to their username on their server. Before I only had access to their server names but not anymore!

More later...

Bringing Stuff Forth
Now Playing: I'm Not Tired Yet - Mississippi Mass Choir
Topic: Life
OK tonight I get to bring some stuff forward. Some of this stuff might not be suitable for the younger crowd, so proceed with caution.

Let me just say this now: I'm a freak. A BIG freak. Yes I love sex and can't get enough of it. I guess that's one thing that some people that I've dated can say about me (among other things). There are some people in my life that I've messed around with, others that I would LOVE to mess around with, and some I wish I had NEVER messed around with. A good example of someone I have messed around with is Twan. Twan is very attractive, masculine, a big freak like me and knows EVERYTHING about me. (If you truly know me you know what I'm getting at.) Anyhow Twan comes over, we're watching TV and I truly can't resist him. Next thing you know clothes are going every which way and we're making hot passionate love all over the house. The boy truly has it going on! For the first time in a long time I felt good that night and let him do certain things that I wouldn't let the average person do, including my previous two ex's. I took him inside me, right before we exploded all over the place. Yes, being with him I also discovered my versatile side. After we finished we just laid there in the bed in each other's arms and drifted off to sleep. That is stuff that I miss, truly.

Let me not forget the fact that there is someone waiting for me in DC: Vince. Vince is a wonderful person and I await the opportunity to get to know him and to be with him. He's attractive, sweet, and quite possibly just as hot and freaky as I am. He's said several things over the past few days that's making me truly want him, such as the fact that each time I talk to him he gets hard and has explained in detail what he wants to do, such as this text message he sent me:
I like you. I want u to fuck me nice and hard.
All I can say is that I want to as well! If you were to see a photo of this person you would understand.

I guess some people would say I have an addiction to sex but I call it a passion for it. I guess some people would say I'm a hoe but we've all been a hoe at one point or another right? Sure people can say they love sex but not very many people can actually prove it.

I can.

Another Sunday Night
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Elle (Copyright Re-Edit) - DJ Gregory
Topic: Life
Just another Sunday. Nothing that exciting to report.

With the warmer weather approaching, it's time to figure out what to do for my birthday. So far it's a toss up between inviting all my friends/associates over and chillin out (having a get-together) or going out with my closest friends. I still have a month or so to decide, so we'll see.

Tony and I went out to the club on yesterday. We actually had fun. Saw a few people there that I knew and got a chance to see Tony get "affected"...it was quite funny. I got in about 3am and went to sleep. Got up today, kicked around the house and went to church. Now I'm sitting in the house, chillin out, getting ready to go back to the dungeon tomorrow. I guess I shouldn't call my job a dungeon, but I'm grateful for it, because so many people out there aren't working.

I've fallen in love with ITunes from Apple. 99 cents a clip; you can't beat that! I think I've spent about $10 downloading stuff (including the track I'm listening to now). I guess I can thank Tony for that too because he introduced me to it, and now I can't get enough of it.

Dinner's ready. More later...

I'm Honored!!!
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
When niggas find it necessary to tell lies about you to people you don't even know, you should be honored. It shows that they are exerting so much energy about you and about the past that they get mad that they fucked shit up.

A certain individual finds it necessary to e-mail everyone that has left a comment in my blog telling lies about me. So let me put the truth out there. Mr. Ray Harrell is the one that is a psycho. When individuals have moved on and forgotton about them, they find it necessary to try and force their way back into your life. They will do anything, say anything, to make themselves seen, and to make it seem like it was the other person's fault. That in itself is usually an ADMISSION OF GUILT.

No one will intimidate me, no one will make me fear them by spreading lies. Especially no tired sick bastard in another state.

So because of this I have blocked all comments to this blog. If you'd like to leave a comment please feel free to e-mail me. Oh by the way a footnote, I had to approve all comments before they were seen, so stupid bullshit was not (and never will be) seen by the public.

Glad It's Done!
Mood:  happy
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
In exchange for getting Ray to leave me alone I agreed to give him back his share of the money he paid for the hotel. I thought I'd have to wait until May 14 but thanks to the good old Bank, I'm able to give him back his money TODAY. (Thank you God!) I'm sending him a check; I seriously hope that he does what the enclosed letter says, which is to cash the check IMMEDIATELY.

This is how much I want to be done with him and to put him behind me.

We now resume our regularly scheduled program - already in progress...

People Can't Get Over Me
Mood:  quizzical
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
This entry is all about me this evening.

Why is it that homosexuals that ended a relationship all of a sudden want to question what the ex is doing? Why is it that homosexuals (hence known as fags) want to try and run interference with someone that they do not know?

I'm wondering why Ray is still all up in my business. I know why. Because he hasn't gotton over me yet. I suggest he does, because I've already played past him. Been played past him. Yes I'm dating because I knew from jump that our previous relationship was a JOKE. Am I trying to jump into another relationship? Nah. Am I trying to get to know people? Of course. Who knows, maybe I'll find somebody that isn't a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde or trying to hide something. Maybe I'll find someone that is 100...hell, ONE time better than Mr. Ray Harrell.

More later...

Funtime
Now Playing: Gonna Make You Get Down (mix) - Dweed
Topic: Life
Well needless to say, I had fun on Saturday night when I went out to the Nutbush. Saw a few people that I knew, met some new ones, networked, and had a blast. I initially said to myself that I would be leaving to head home about 12:30-1:00AM..instead I ended up staying until almost 2:00AM! It was that much fun. Probably the funniest moment was when this guy walks up to me and introduces himself. (I forgot his name.) We talk for about 30 seconds when he asks me what I'm doing after I leave the club. I told him "I'm going home". He asked me if I wanted to "hang out" with him and go to this other club way over on 63rd and Harlem somewheres. I probably would've gone with him until he told me "well since you live on the south side it's right by you". Why is it that everybody ASSUMES that because you live in one part of the city that everything is right by you? I turned him down, but not after he bought me another Coca-Cola.

I've been meeting people just to get to know them too. For instance I'm going to meet this guy named Vincent when I go to DC next month. Vincent seems like a cool guy, like someone I'd like to get to know. Only time will tell though. On the home front there's Dre. Now Dre I'm not so sure about because he came over to the house today and fell asleep. Understanding that he was tired, he shouldn't have come over, even if he wanted to see me. First impressions are the ones that last longest, right? My first impression of him is that he was tired, but wanted to see me anyway. Then he fell asleep, got back up, we went to get something to eat, came back to the house, and he wanted to play on the computer while I'm trying to get to know him and talk to him. Finally he leaves, but I digress. Then there's Jason, a brotha that lives on the south side. He's short, dark skinned and attractive. I'd like to see what's up there. Like I said before, right now I'm looking to date, and that's about it.

This weekend myself and a few friends are going to the casino. Haven't decided yet which one to go to, Horseshoe in Hammond or Potawatomi in Milwaukee. Horseshoe in Hammond is closer, but I have comp points for Potawatomi. I'll decide before Friday...I hope.

More later...

Trying Something Different
Now Playing: Seal - Love's Divine
Topic: Life
Being somewhat over the Ray incident now, I've decided to go out tonight. Yes you heard it, tonight I'm going out to shake my booty and have some fun.

I have to admit, going through the "Ray" incident taught me something. It taught me that I'm letting life pass me by and I'm not truly enjoying it. So we're going to try something different. I'm going to get out of the house more, meet new people, keep my friends in the loop and do things for ME, not for other people as I have done in the past.

Going back to tonight, I think I'm going to a club on the northside and will most definitely end up at the Nutbush in Forest Park. I was talking with my friend Iman about going out tonight and he almost fainted...that's how long it's been since I've been out. OK let me spell it out: LAST DECEMBER. Last December I went to the Prop House and said I'd never go there again. Why? $15 to get into a club to see a whole bunch of feminine boys vogue? No thank you. Not my cup of tea.

I updated my webpage tonight. Added some new links and stuff. Made it look a little cooler. Plus I met someone today. His name is Ralph and he lives in Detroit. Now while I'm not looking for a relationship (or even entertaining that option right now) I can still meet people and hang out with them. That's all I'm doing.

More later...

I'm Grateful...
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
I'm grateful that I got away from Ray. He is truly a "dr. jekyll and mr. hyde". One minute he claims to love and miss me, the next minute he's attempting to threaten me. One thing he should know is that I'm not easily intimiated. I know the law and have a pretty damn good lawyer. All of this is referring to the trip to DC next month. He decided yesterday that he didn't want to go because of the breakup. Not once did I tell him not to go. On all of the information, the receipts, everything, it clearly states, NO REFUNDS FOR ANY REASON. Why is he attempting to extort money from me? Because he's angry that we're done, that's why. Sorry kiddo, that's not going to work. And if it takes a restraining order to get him off my back, so be it!

More later...

Untitled
Mood:  sad
Topic: Life
As of this afternoon, Ray and I split up. Not by my choice however. Let me put the story out there. Earlier this morning Ray received a text message while in church that simply said "hey baby". I wanted to know who sent that, so after church I asked Ray who sent it. He said "a friend of mine", and I was ready to leave it at that because I had some other stuff on my mind. We get into an argument over his thinking that I had an attitude because someone sent him a text message (which incidentally, was not the case because I had played past it), we start yelling at each other, he calls me out of my name, and the next thing you know I'm doing 90 on the Dan Ryan trying to get him home to get his stuff, seeing as at this point he was ready to leave. He blamed me for "fucking up the day" and accused me of accusing him of sleeping with someone. (Note, usually people that are like that have something to hide.) We get back to my place and he immediately asks for his money back for the trip to DC. Keep in mind that it says on the info packets that were given out as well as on the receipts that there are NO REFUNDS. My thought on that is if he wants to try, go ahead, but any court of law will see that and immediately throw the case out. He leaves at that point.

I'm actually glad I see all this now because now I see what type of individual he is. Maybe I didn't need to be with someone that is such a spoiled child. And he got one thing right, I do like things to do my way. It's called keeping things orderly. Most people that I know have no problem with it, it's just spoiled children that like to try and run things that have an issue with it. I'm not about to concede, kiss ass or anything of that nature. Either deal with me or step aside.

Seems that Ray chose to step aside.

Not Too Much...
Now Playing: You Only Live Once - Yanni
Topic: Life
Well there's not too much to say today. Ray is coming down tomorrow and we're going to see the White Sox game at US Cellular Field (aka Comiskey Park). I guess for the most part we're ok, even though we have our ups and downs.

I was looking out my window this evening at the city and just thinking about how blessed I am to be where I am right now. True everything isn't perfect, but I'm comfortable. I got a nice job, nice crib, nice ride and even a nice boyfriend, thanks to our Father in Heaven. I'm truly grateful for the blessings both seen and unseen. Speaking of looking out the window, here's the view from my apartment:

More Later.

Isn't It Funny?
Mood:  quizzical
Now Playing: Virgin Island - Kenny G /// Japan - Kenny G
Topic: Life
Isn't it funny how when you try to tell people something for their own good, they blow it (and you) off?

Isn't it funny that people from your past can't admit that they still have feelings for you...even though the relationship (or lack thereof) ended long ago?

Isn't it funny that when you try to get a straight answer out of people, they want to be full of shit?

That's pretty much my list of questions for the evening. A certain individual (who we'll call Person X) came over this evening and fit the category of all of the questions above. If you've kept up with my entries, you know who Person X is. (Note: Ray, you know who I'm talking about fa sho.) I just wanna know, is it that hard to keep it real about stuff? Have I been sleeping all this time and society changed that much? KEEP IT REAL PEOPLE. In the long run it'll make the world a much better place.

On a personal note, this Saturday I'm going to my first home game of the year for the White Sox at US Cellular Field. I'm pretty excited about it, and Ray will be there with me, so that'll be fun. I mean think about it, two guys, baseball, hot dogs (and beer) and a beautiful Saturday afternoon. Can't beat that!!! My former friend Phillip was supposed to come with me but after this afternoon that won't be happening. What happened...I'm glad you asked! Don't play me for a fool, that's all I'll say on the matter. Don't act like I was born yesterday, and don't try to play stupid games with me. Don't let me believe you want to be friends when you are trying to pretty much stab me in the back. Yeah you might have a flashy car and a nice job, but you don't really have a pot to piss in. None of us do actually, because we're all one half-paycheck away from being homeless, carless and without a friend in the world.

Think I've said enough for this evening. More later...

Decisions - Some Made For Me, Some Made By Me
Now Playing: Japan - Kenny G
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
This entry has been labeled PRIVATE by the weblog author.

You gotta be kiddin me!!!
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Japan - Kenny G
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
This entry has been labeled PRIVATE by the weblog author.

It's The Weekend!!
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: Rescue - Ashanti
Well it's the weekend again, so you know what that means...Ray is in town. :)

Last night we went to a meet-and-greet for one of my PRIDE members at work. We honestly had a good time, even though he (Ray) arrived about 15 minutes LATE...but I blame traffic on that. We stayed at the meet-and-greet for about an hour, then we went home and chilled out for a bit, then went to Indiana to get gas and just to ride around for a while.

Saturday we got up and did some sightseeing. I got some good pictures in, like the one below from Rainbow Beach:

Tonight we're going to a gala for the Center on Halsted at the Sheraton. Mayor Daley is being honored for his work in the community and such. I have to admit, I hope that Ray isn't another Kiantae in terms of benefits. Kiantae was someone I dated back in 2003, and needless to say it ended badly. I compare Ray to Kiantae in this way; there was a function back on 11/23/03 that we attended, it was not as high-class and as important as the affair tonight. I invited Kiantae to come with and he truly didn't have a good time. It showed, BADLY. Yes I was embarassed, especially when a couple of people that knew me came up to me and asked me what was his problem! Now at that event (as this one tonight) I was representing the job and the company, and he pulled a number like that. Unbelieveable. Tonight's event is even more important because, as I said before, Mayor Daley will be there. Ass kissing? ABSOLUTELY!

While Ray and I were out earlier I ran into this guy I haven't seen in about two years named Jerome. I gave him a lift downtown and we said we'd try to meet up later. Now when Jerome and I used to hang out, needless to say he and I were both a little buck-wild, but I'm happy to know that we've BOTH slowed down...and now are "married" to our respective sweethearts, sort of speak. The interesting thing is that on the way downtown, we were talking about the way things USED to be, say 3, 4, 5 years ago. Millenium Park wasn't there that long ago, and it was Grant Park...where all of the gay folks hung out (on top of hanging out at State and Lake downtown and in various other parts of the city). I kinda miss the way things were, because everyone was HAPPY. Nowadays it seems like everyone is bitter, evil, and jaded. Then they took Grant Park away, sent the police to patrol State and Lake, and basically made it impossible to really hang out downtown. Sad to see how things changed...seemingly overnight.

Time to get ready for this event tonight. More later.

Trials and Tribblations...
Mood:  happy
Topic: Life
A whole lot of things have happened since we last were together.

Let's start with Ray. Yes the road has been bumpy but for the most part we're still all good. We've debated over a multitude of topics; I'll get to that later. He came down here this past weekend and we had a wonderful time. Friday evening we didn't do anything, we stayed in the house and watched TV and chilled out. Saturday we got up and went to North Riverside Mall, drove around and enjoyed each other's company. Sunday we went to Millenium Park and to Dave and Buster's (firsts for Ray), then the weekend came to an end, much to my dismay. I truly hate it when we have to leave each other after a wonderful weekend. In all honesty I'll be glad when we finally get to live, if not together, in the same city, whereas we can see each other more than just on the weekends.

This upcoming weekend Ray is coming down here again, only this time we'll be going to a gala on Saturday night for the Center on Halsted. Mayor Daley is being honored at this dinner, so it should be very exciting!!! Then the following weekend he'll be back here again, this time to go to a White Sox game with me. Then I guess I'll have to go to Wisconsin for a weekend...lol

This isn't to say that it's all happiness with us. We've had our heated discussions about his issues and about our future. Personally I don't like it that he doesn't completely trust me but I now know that in time he will. I know that there will be a whole lot of things that we don't agree on but the trick is to get past it. But I love him, and love truly conquers all.

Some Funny Stuff
Mood:  quizzical
Topic: Niggas and Negroes
Why is the world so small? Why is it that people find out you're in a relationship and either (1) crawl out of the woodwork to try and have something that they either (a) discarded or (b) fucked over, or (2) they want to test your will power?

Needless to say this evening Cory came over this evening. Whereas we have fucked around almost every time he has come over in the past tonight it was different. We didn't fuck around. Think Ray had something to do with that? Absolutely! The thing about Cory that I find interesting is that in my opinion he doesn't know what he truly wants, but he wants to believe that he knows what he wants. One of the reasons why it didn't work out when we were dating a while back was because he didn't know what he wanted. Don't get me wrong, I still love him as a friend but that's the extent of it, even though I know he wants more, whether it's a true relationship or a sexual relationship I don't know. But I think we both know that it won't happen. (I know he'll be reading this entry.)

My friend D just buzzed from downstairs. More later....

Wow - What A Weekend!
Mood:  happy
This past weekend I spent it in Milwaukee with my baby Ray. I tell you, I had so much fun just being with him.

For starters, Friday night we just stayed in the house and chilled out, watched some movies and went to sleep. Saturday morning Ray and I got up, and he took me to breakfast. Then he showed me around Milwaukee, showed me downtown and all the different sights. After that it was back to the house for a brief rest before going to a comedy show at Potawatomi Casino Saturday night. After the show we went into the casino and played around on the slots a bit. (Yes I won a little somethin-somethin.) We finally left the casino and got back to Ray's house about 1:30AM. Sunday came entirely too quickly, as it was time for me to drive back home to Chicago. I honestly told him today that I hated this back-and-forth thing, that I hated only being able to see him on weekends. I also told him that this sort of thing could be healthy for a relationship; it gives the couple a chance to miss each other, but everything good isn't always good.

Honestly, I didn't want to come back. I wanted to stay with my baby. But responsibilities and duty calls, so here I be. Next weekend Ray is coming back to Chicago so we'll get to hang here.

On a different note, I received my wireless/wired gateway from SBC on Friday. Hooked it up tonight and it's running all good. I got it because Ray (and my friend Paul) have laptops with the wireless technology, so now they can access the Internet without tying up my desktop. It only cost me $150.

More later, time to go to bed and think about my baby.